My Girlfriend is Pregnant
So, your girlfriend just informed you that she is pregnant. You’ve helped to create another human being. No matter how you look at it, it’s a big deal.
You probably never meant for this to happen. Maybe you really care about her and feel responsible to do something about it. Or maybe you didn’t really want to stay with her forever. Either way, the pressure is on and emotions are running high.
You may feel shocked, anxious and fearful. Sometimes this leads to depression. You should find someone you trust to talk to.
You may want to act like this didn’t happen and avoid dealing with it. But that won’t make it go away. You need to face the facts. Allow others to help you through this difficult time. We can provide you with free, confidential, and non-judgmental support. Call us at 1-888-LIFE AID. Support services are available statewide.
Supporting Your Girlfriend
Just as your girlfriend’s pregnancy has changed her life, your life will never be the same again, either. But your life isn’t over. You are a father. You can handle this responsibility and we can help. Here are some pointers for supporting your girlfriend and helping her to realize that you want to be in this together with her.
- She needs to talk.
- Let her know you care about what she’s feeling.
- Be patient—she’s uncomfortable and tired.
- Be understanding—this is just as new to her as it is to you.
- Admit there is no way you could possibly understand exactly what she’s going through, but that you are there for her if she needs you.
- Make sure she gets what she needs—good food, sleep, relaxation.
- Take on additional responsibilities.
- Let her know your thoughts, ideas and opinions.
- Let her know you are there for her and are a part of her pregnancy—you are in this together.
- Go with her to talk to her parents.
- Drive her to appointments, sonograms, pregnancy centers and prenatal care.
- Protect her.
- Affirm her for her courage.
- Acknowledge her feelings and fears.
- Try to understand her feelings.
- Be sensitive to her physical/emotional condition.
- Be a gentleman.
- Read pregnancy books along with your partner to learn and prepare for everything ahead of you.
- Discuss how you can help financially.
- Call us. We can help you and your girlfriend get the support you need and make the decision that is right for you. Whether you need support or just someone to discuss the options, we are here for you. 1-888-LIFE AID.
If you don’t agree
Perhaps you and your girlfriend do not agree on what should be done. It won’t help to pressure her to make a quick decision. You cannot choose for her, but you can let her know that you will support her. Ask her to think it over for a few more days. It is better to slow down and take your time when making important decisions. Ask if she will at least agree to talk with someone else to discuss the pregnancy, parenting and adoption support services available.
Even if she won’t agree, you do not have to go through this alone. We can provide free, confidential and non-judgmental support for both of you.